"Our job is not to deny the story, but to defy the ending-to rise strong, recognize our story, and rumble with the truth until we get to a place where we think, Yes. This is what happened. This is my truth. And I will choose how the story ends" -Brene Brown, Rising Strong
Recognizing the self limiting stories we tell about ourselves allows us to consider the grand narrative we may be stuck in. I myself have come face to face with the narrative I was telling...a narrative with a victim at the centre of a harsh world. Our attachment to our beliefs about ourselves and our perspectives of those around us can leave us with scars...scars that remind us of the meaning we have attached to them.
So how do you describe the protagonist in the grand narrative called "life"? Broken, abandoned, abused? Perhaps you have had someone precious taken from you, maybe you feel displaced due to a hectic childhood of moving from town to town. The events that have happened in my personal life have left me feeling alone, disconnected and angry. I have held on to the stories, I have questioned my ability to be whole, and I have looked at life through the lens of pain. I cannot deny that I experienced great trauma growing up, but must we punish ourselves continuously by reliving the story?
Identify your story...tell your narrative with vivid detail. Invite the feelings and emotions that pull you out of your power and your presence to the table. Be vulnerable and honest. Have you narrated a story that will unfold before you even enter into a situation? What picture are you painting of yourself to those around you? Is it a picture of a victim? Why should you be condemned as a victim for the way others have treated you? Is it a picture of a hero? Why should you have to carry the weight of the world? Why must you solve all of the problems? Both the victim and the hero have heavy burdens to carry, and it's important for us to identify the reasons for our inability to release the weight. We must rumble with the truth, and distinguish between something that happened, and the story we have written about those events in order to release the weight.
So what memos are we generating about the events that have happened to us? For example, a woman who has undergone abuse and abandonment might develop the memo that she is not worthy of love. Someone who was talked over as a child might develop the memo that his or her voice does not deserve to be heard. But how can we re write these memos...how can we create a bigger narrative that tells our story in a different way?
By becoming the storyteller of your life, instead of being the story. When we decide to become the storyteller we have the power to challenge the projections in our life that rob us of having control over our own circumstances. We can turn those projections into reflections...to see more about ourselves, and to have power over the lens with which we view life.
Consider the qualities about yourself that are essential , and define the vivid energies within you that must not be compressed. For example, I am gullible and often naive, however I cherish this quality in me because I have a childlike curiosity that trusts...and looks at the world through wide eyes. I am also too emotional, and am deeply effected by other peoples feelings (which can be quite consuming). I can also see this quality as essential to my soul. I am emotionally in tune with those around me, and I am compassionate about their feelings, and I am able to express myself fully and openly without inhibition. Even if my emotions become consuming, it helps me connect with others on a deeper level, which is important to me.
In this way we can challenge that self judging inner voice that dampens those authentic qualities within us. By identifying these habits we have power over them, and when this happens we are able to reclaim our presence and our voice from a deep level of validation and self acceptance. When you have the power to carve your own path and have control over the grand narrative of your life...you will be able to build boundaries around the people and situations in your life which you must say a soulful no to.
What dulls your light? What opportunities have you turned down because of you're self limiting beliefs about yourself? Be arrogant enough to decide that you are worth it all, and that anything that your soul hungers for can and will be apart of the story you write. Show up for yourself and let that inner light shine!
Hi! My name is Amber, I am a wife and mother to Piper June. Welcome to my blog. You will find my path towards natural health and wellness as well as my honest discoveries as a new mother. In all aspects of life, I strive to cultivate Balance through a mindful existence. I share my experiences as a mother, helpful product reviews and companies that I am passionate about for our family. I am so grateful for your visit xo